Episode #51: How to Find More Time For Yourself with Michele Santo
Michelle Fox: [00:00:00] Welcome to this week's episode of Nourish with Michelle Fox. I am thrilled to be with Michele Santo in this conversation. And I wanted to come on before the actual episode, just to let you know, Michele leads us through a beautiful meditation at the top of the episode. So I encourage you to make this perhaps like a pocket meditation, whenever you need a little bit of grounding. It's such a beautiful opportunity to take. about seven minutes. To sit. Get grounded and you have my word. You will feel so good. By listening to this. So listen to it now with whatever you're doing, even if you're driving, but of course, keep your eyes open. Um, but perhaps earmark this one to come back to it again and again.
When you need that extra comfort and an opportunity to ground [00:01:00] yourself. So without further ado. Here's episode 51. Welcome to Nourish. I am Michelle Fox culinary nutritionist health coach, and your host for this podcast. I teach busy professionals, how to get more nutrition in their bodies. And how to have more fun in their home kitchens. If you struggle with consistency. Or sometimes forget to make your needs a priority.
You, my friend are in the right place. Join me each week for inspiration to increase your energy. Strengthen your mindset, manage your hormonal woes and so much more. You have a lot on your plate, but that does not mean your nutrition should suffer. You deserve to live in a body and have a life that you love.
So let's dig in. [00:02:00] Welcome to the show. This is really special and near and dear to my heart because the community has spoken. You have asked for Michelle Santo to come back. Very rarely do we have a guest come back for a second time, but she has generously and graciously said yes. So she is here to walk through tapping with us.
Raise your hand. Yes, I see you. my friend who's walking and or at the gym or driving. Raise your hand if you could use some more grounding in your life. Hopefully you listened and or watched the episode number 42 where Michelle Santo walked us through how to tap through a craving. A lot of us get food cravings, whether it's sugar.[00:03:00]
Yes, that's me raising my hand over here. Some of us crave salt, some of us crave other things, and the beautiful thing is we have tools to relax our nervous systems so that we have more control over. Let's say, you know, things in our life that maybe we just wanna get a little bit better at or have more control over.
So before I bring Michelle to the stage, I want to let you know she is an inspired energy healer and writer. She helps women create more fulfilling relationships by asking for what they want. Without hurting a soul, of course. And her YouTube videos are a portal to peace. So Michelle, welcome back to the
Michele Santo: show.
Thank you. I'm so excited to continue this conversation.
Michelle Fox: Hmm. So normally I jump in and I ask you to play a rapid fire game, but because we did that already in [00:04:00] episode 42, and because I know you have. Again, generously, I can't use that word enough. I just so love your spirit and, and the time you're willing to share with us, but you've offered to give us a grounding.
I would love to start off with a grounding before we actually jump into the tapping. Will that work for you?
Michele Santo: Oh, beautiful. Okay, well to everybody here, I'm so happy to be back and connecting with you again. So if it is safe, wherever you are, I invite you to close your eyes and we're just going to get out of the head and drop down into our hearts and into our body.
We can't do this enough. And this grounding exercise I try to do every morning as much as I can, especially if I'm gonna be in a crowd of people. Okay, so as we're here, I want you to take a deep breath in through the [00:05:00] nose, let it go through the mouth.
I want you to imagine we're gonna do a lot of visualizing right now, so this is a great vi visualization meditation to help you center your day. Just imagine that your head is like a watermelon, and I want you to notice if there are any unfinished conversations, things on your to-do list. Just future tripping.
Like if you're thinking about anything in the future that you have going on, I want you to just pretend to scoop that out, like you're scooping out the watermelon seeds and just clear the space in your mind to be present with us right now. And if you desire. You can pretend like this hollow watermelon is your sanctuary, and feel free to visually [00:06:00] decorate it however you wish.
You can spray calming essential oils, fluff up some pillows. Whatever you need is great. Okay. From here we're going to send the energy down, so I want you to soften your eyebrows. Soften the muscles behind your eyes. Let go of your cheekbones, like your muscles there, just gently unclench the jaw. You can roll your neck one way and roll it the other way.
And then slowly sending a healing vibration down into the chest area and have it dripping down your arms, like a warm h nectar, just filling you with light and calm and peace. [00:07:00] Allow that beautiful, gooey honey bomb healing energy to drop into your heart. Thanking you for showing up for this moment to feel more grounded and allowing that gooey healing bal to melt down to your beautiful organs that just play this wonderful symphony without you having to sway your arms and tell it what to do.
And as you notice, if you're seated, just feel supported in the chair. Just know that the universe has your back and allow that gooey healing balm energy to flow down your legs, from your hips to your knees, from your knees, to your ankles. And from your ankles to your feet and [00:08:00] your toes. So you can send a grounding cord.
Either way, it can go below the feet or below the tailbone. Whatever feels right for you in this moment. And just imagine that there's a fishing line of energy. It can be as thin as a fishing line or as wide as a tree trunk. And it could be as wide as your hips, whatever you prefer, just send your energy down into Mother Earth.
And as you imagine this grounding cord is going through the foundation of the house or beneath you on the road. It is going into the soil. You're passing some rocks. You're passing living water, and you finally find either a tree [00:09:00] branch or you can visualize a beautiful garnet stone. Now just wrap your energy grounding cord around the stone or the tree trunk, whatever you prefer, and as you do, you're anchoring yourself in this moment.
And feel free to write your initials just to say you were there. And the beautiful part of Mother Earth is it is always giving, its healing electromed energy to us. So now we're gonna do the reverse, bring Mother Earth's healing energy up through that grounding cord. Just see it traveling up. It's a slower energy.
It's dense like a tree. And imagine it filling in through your feet in, through the, the calves and the shins [00:10:00] your knees, filling the thighs and the hip area. Filling your backside and coming up through your torso, blessing your heart, saying hi to your lungs, and then coming up through the shoulders and out through the arms.
And now this beautiful healing mother earth energy is rising up through the throat. Clearing any blockages to speaking your truth and filling the head. And now pretend like you're a whale. I want you to visualize a spout at the top of your head and this beautiful mother earth. Healing energy is cascading and a circle around your aura,
and if you believe in a higher power, you can call [00:11:00] that in to protect you.
It can be an archangel, a healed ancestor God source, whatever you wish. Whatever you believe in is right, and as you feel their loving and protection, just do one last step and imagine a ring of fire around that. So the ring of fire is gonna burn away. Anything that gets in the way. Of what you're here to do.
Taking a gentle breath in through the nose, sighing out through the mouth,
and then when you're ready, you can open your eyes, your time. How are you feeling?
Hmm.
Michelle Fox: So relaxed. Oh my goodness.
Yeah. Feel like I'm, I'm like taking a nap [00:12:00] as I'm sitting here in my office chair. So healing. And then when you talked about the Garnet stone, I kind of brought the red energy up and so my body broke out into some heat, but it's like a loving warming here, so I just, I am just fascinated by this healing modality.
This, this feels amazing. Thank you, Michelle.
Okay. I guess I, we still have a podcast interview to do, right?
No, this is fabulous because now I be more present and. Oh, be more of a sponge to take in this information because I still remain so fascinated by the power of E F T and from my friends who may have not heard our episode. Again, that's episode number 42. Will you just explain like at a very high level, like what is E F T and why do we
Michele Santo: wanna do it?[00:13:00]
Well, it helps you melt a freak out in minutes. Really, that's the essence of tapping and when you see, you see a lot of conversation about regulating the nervous system. This is just one way you can do it, and you have the power at your fingertips too. Try this modality wherever you are. That's why I love it.
You can do it with a practitioner on your own. Now, the general description that I like to use is emotional freedom technique, also known as E F T or tapping. It is based on the work of Roger Callahan and they consider it energy psychology and it's a beautiful blend of. Ancient Chinese wisdom. It's actually based on acupuncture.
So that's been around for 5,000 years and we know that that works. So instead of using little needles, you're actually gently tapping on these the same [00:14:00] points,
it's
less invasive and you're moving the energy to a more balanced state. But it's also positive psychology. 'cause as we're tapping on these points, we're talking about what annoys us.
So you're processing your feelings, you know, verbally and cognitively, but you're also accessing the body. And this is why I love it, is you're changing something about your emotional state. So when you think of the nervous system, it's meant to be a flowing hose to flow your energy. It's meant to be just flowing.
And when we don't clear out our stress, that's when we get into trouble and our digestive system is not working. And I know that, you know, with your retreat coming up, digestion is so important for your health. And so it's just one way to release anxiety by 40% [00:15:00] in as fast as 10 minutes.
Michelle Fox: Ah, so this is the perfect time to segment into an invitation for you. My friend, Michelle Santo, just made reference to the retreat. Which, yes, we are heading to Tamarindo Costa Rica. This coming February. You can find all the information at michellefox.com/retreat. And I am talking to you, especially my friend over 40. You are ready to hit the reset button. You are ready to be pampered. You are ready to be in a circle of like minded women, where you get ample solo time, and then plenty of time for our connection as well. Come on over to michellefox.com/retreat and plan on packing your bags to join us in Costa Rica.
Oh, yay. Well then let's jump in.
As I was preparing for this talk, I kind of crowdsourced my community to see, what are some common issues that women are facing that we can just tap right on out? And the number one issue that has arrived is women feeling like they just don't have time and. It feels like that's a hard stop, but just to get more granular, women are feeling like they don't have time to meal prep.
They don't have time to take a bath. They don't have time for me time. They don't have time to really pay attention to their nervous systems. And so today. I would like for us to walk through an exercise if you are open, where we can tap out our limitation around boundaries, around [00:17:00] our self-care time.
So women want help. We are craving help to be able to have the confidence to crave out our own me time, and then also to be able to keep boundaries around that. And so for this episode, it would be a huge gift if we could just tap that out and so women can come back to this episode, play it as many times as they want, if they.
Start feeling themselves kind of, you know, eek into old patterns. It's like, nope, we're tapping it out so that we can have that confidence to take care of our nervous systems. Will that work for you? Sure. Happy to. Okay, then I'll, I'm happy to be your Guinea pig 'cause I am a huge proponent in taking that time and making that time for ourselves.
Michele Santo: Mm-hmm. Okay, so maybe we're talking about, you had [00:18:00] said before we press record that sometimes, and maybe you feel this way, you have a family and everyone has
different eating preferences, which is completely normal. We're all individual. And then you find yourself at dinnertime making two separate meals just to appease everyone around the table.
And so you could do, you could do dinnertime like that. But what if there was another option where you guys can compromise a little bit and therefore save your time and energy in making dinner and just simplifying it?
Michelle Fox: Hmm. I love that example. 'cause yes, if I as the cook, we'll just say, for lack of a better word, if I'm the cook in the family, if I am spending all this time making multiple meals, perhaps that's one way I can create more time.
I can see how if I'm only cooking that
one meal, perhaps, maybe that's even 30 minutes I can have to myself [00:19:00] later. So yes, I'm loving this example.
Michele Santo: I think it's just a matter of realizing that we're all programmed as women. To take care of the family, and you can do it at any level that you want, which I think is really great.
So if we're, you know, making two meals every night for dinner doesn't work for you, let's, let's tap out the stress of speaking up and saying, Hey, I wanna make everybody happy here, but you know, mommy needs time to herself, so let's just find, find a way to feel more confident in claiming that time for yourself.
Right?
Michelle Fox: And as we jump in, I also wanna encourage our listeners, like perhaps it's not the cooking two meals. Maybe that's not your issue of. It's taking up all your time, but perhaps it's at work. Maybe not holding your [00:20:00] boundaries and working more than perhaps you necessarily want to or need to because you didn't have that confidence to say no.
So I just invite you. Dear listener, to look at an area of your life where you may have what we call leaky boundaries. And that might be an area where we can grab back some of that time so that we can have more time to focus on you and to doing the things that you love. And at the very least, 'cause I know a lot of us don't necessarily know what we even love or have a passion for, but at the very least it's going to be.
Calming your nervous system, so you will be in a space to make better decisions and make better choices for yourself. I love that. Okay,
Michele Santo: well, I will just, I'll get started. So Michelle, thank you for, being open to tapping again, and then I would love for you to close your eyes when you're ready. And now [00:21:00] this is the point.
We're just gonna tune in to see how we feel. So when you, when you really think about the stress of having that conversation and changing the dinner operations at home with the family and saying, Hey, you know, we have to do things differently here so mommy can have some time. How stressful does it feel to speak up for your needs on the scale of one to 10, 10 being the worst?
Michelle Fox: I would say an eight. I've got some sassy teenagers.
Michele Santo: Okay. And when you think about that issue, can you distill it down to an emotion?
Michelle Fox: I don't know if is discomfort in emotion, because as I'm thinking about it, my stomach gets a little bit tight when I'm Yeah. Thinking of making one of. My meals that I love, that I know that my kiddos do not love. Kinda
Michele Santo: it could be fear or frustration. I'm not sure if discomfort. I think it can be, [00:22:00] oh,
Michelle Fox: I like frustration.
Frustration, yeah. I'll take frustration.
Michele Santo: And what is the worst thing that could happen if you had this conversation and things started to change, you know, to support your precious time?
Michelle Fox: I think the worst that would happen is that they just would not eat dinner with me, and that they're, now that they can drive, they'll go and, and eat junk food.
Hmm.
Michele Santo: That's a valid concern. Okay. All right. I'm just writing down some notes because we're actually just gonna use your own words in the tapping script.
Hmm. All right. Is there anything else you wanna share about this? Any other annoyances?
Michelle Fox: yes. I feel, just to be completely transparent, I feel like I'm 50% [00:23:00] sharing my experience. but 50% is not quite my experience. So I'm trying to feel out what I know some of my community members have shared with me.
so I will also say, The other piece or emotion I'm feeling around this dinner situation is a frustration of not having enough time. Just this feeling of not having enough time, period. So I would love to have more time to take a longer bath at night and or to read that book. I keep meaning to read, but I come to the end of the night and I'm exhausted, and so I'm going straight to bed.
So, I guess frustration and resentment actually. Mm-hmm. Is popping up as well.
Michele Santo: Yeah.
You feel resentful. Yeah. That's how you know things have to change. That's a very good indicator that things are not working for you and that's okay. Hmm. So if I may ask [00:24:00] another question, I look what, what? What's your day like?
Like that you're, you feel a little worried that you don't have enough time. Are you spending most of the time on the phone, are you working with clients, creating content? Like what is eating up all your time?
Michelle Fox: At the time of this recording, it is summer and so the kiddos are home and so yes, it is. My daily work responsibilities, and it's the one-offs of, oh, I need help with this job application.
Oh, I need help. Um, can you drive me to my lacrosse practice? Oh, I need help. This issue's happening with my friends. Do you have a minute to listen? So there's just lots of one-offs during my day, which I absolutely love. So definitely not complaining about [00:25:00] that part. Like I love the opportunity to spend that time with my children, and I will say I haven't quite figured out how to balance time with them and getting my work done
Michele Santo: right.
I completely understand that. My mother worked from home as well, and so I was always interrupting her. And now that I think about it, now that I'm working from home, I'm going, she was so kind to answer all my questions. She could've told me to go away. We'll talk at dinner, you know. okay, so maybe for you, it's a matter of setting working hours where there's a sign on the door that says, do not interrupt.
Is that a possibility? That is a possibility. Okay. I don't know where I saw this, Michelle. It might have been an origin sister, but I swear, I swear it was an origin sister where she had these cute puffy hearts. It was like a pillow [00:26:00] heart. And she had her door closed and she put the heart on the, kind of like a hotel sign do not disturb.
Oh, that's a fabulous idea. The kids saw the heart. I guess when anyone saw the heart on the door, it meant Mommy is, is in me time and leave her alone. Don't
Michelle Fox: open that door. Don't open that door. I love that idea. So
Michele Santo: that's, Maybe to find out who that is and shout em out.
Alright, well we will get started and let's, let's start tapping. So, All right, just we'll start on the tap, the side of the hand. Just take two fingers or three fingers and we'll start on the side of the hand. And tapping is most effective when you use your own words. So if anything I say doesn't resonate, just change the words
Michelle Fox: up.
So, for my friends who are listening to the podcast on a podcast platform, wonderful. We'll try to be as [00:27:00] demonstrative as possible. but also, please know you can go to YouTube for this episode at Michelle Fox. Love, and you will see all of this. Goodness.
Michele Santo: Do you want me to run through the tapping points real quick?
Michelle Fox: Well, we did that in episode 42. Okay. So I'd love for our listeners to head back there. But yeah, if you're okay just jumping in, that would be awesome. Yeah, let's jump
Michele Santo: in. Okay. Okay. And re, you're gonna repeat after me and say, even though I'm frustrated about family dinner time,
Michelle Fox: even though I'm frustrated about family dinner time,
Michele Santo: I'm open to loving and accepting myself.
Michelle Fox: I'm open to loving and accepting myself,
Michele Santo: even though I know something has to change.
Michelle Fox: Even though I know something has to change,
Michele Santo: I honor how I feel about it. I honor how I feel about it, even though I'm feeling a little resentful, [00:28:00] even
Michelle Fox: though I'm feeling a little resentful. I'm doing all the
Michele Santo: things.
Michelle Fox: I'm doing, all the
Michele Santo: things, I'm open to finding a new solution,
Michelle Fox: new, I'm open to finding a new solution.
Michele Santo: Okay, tap on the eyebrow point and it's the, it's like the inside of the eyebrow, right above your eye and just say, Ugh, I'm frustrated. Ugh, I'm frustrated. I have sassy teenagers, I have sassy teenagers, and I need to figure out dinner time and I need to figure out dinner. Tap on the side of the eye. It's like the temple on the outside of your eye and just say, I don't know how to manage it all.
I don't know how to manage it all. I wanna make dinner for the family. I wanna make dinner for the [00:29:00] family, but I'm afraid I won't have time for myself, but
Michelle Fox: I'm afraid I won't have time for myself.
Michele Santo: Okay, tapping under the eye, and I accept all of the frustration. When I accept all the frustration. I'm not trying to change it.
I'm not trying to change it. I'm not trying to shoo it away. I'm not trying to shoo it away. I accept that this is an opportunity. I accept this is an opportunity to do things differently, to do things differently. All right. Put your hand on your heart for compassion and tapping under the nose. It's just right at that little divot under your nose
Michelle Fox: and my friends who are trying to work with us through the audio.
Please know we're using our first two fingers to do the tapping parts.
Michele Santo: I'm really frustrated that I don't have enough time. [00:30:00]
Michelle Fox: I'm, I'm really frustrated that I don't have enough time.
Michele Santo: I. wanna take a longer bath.
Michelle Fox: I wanna take a longer bath, and
Michele Santo: I really wanna read that book and
Michelle Fox: I really wanna read that book.
Michele Santo: Okay. Keeping the hand on the heart, tapping on the chin. It's not necessarily the chin, what would you call it? It's like this little, cleft below your lower lip and say, at the end of the day, I feel resentful.
Michelle Fox: At the end of the day, I feel resentful
Michele Santo: because everyone interrupts me while I'm working because everyone
Michelle Fox: interrupts me while I'm
Michele Santo: working.
Okay, now we're gonna move down to the collarbone point. So even though your collarbone is right here, it's like two inches down below the collarbone point. You can't get it wrong. There's points all over the body and say, I'm managing a [00:31:00] lot. I'm managing a lot and I don't wanna be interrupted,
Michelle Fox: and I don't wanna be interrupted,
Michele Santo: and I wanna be there for my kids
Michelle Fox: and I want to be there for my kids, so
Michele Santo: I have to find a better rhythm.
Michelle Fox: So I have to find a better rhythm,
Michele Santo: one that honors their needs and mine,
Michelle Fox: one that honors their needs and mine.
Michele Santo: Okay, now we're gonna move under the arm. So your armpit is here and it's a hand print below the armpit right by bra line if you're a lady, and just say, I know I need to make time for myself.
Michelle Fox: I know I need to make time for myself,
Michele Santo: but I'm afraid the family will fall apart,
Michelle Fox: but I'm afraid the family will fall
Michele Santo: apart.
I know I need to make this easier on me. I know I need to make this easier on me, [00:32:00] but I'm afraid of starting a fight, but I'm afraid of starting a fight. Okay, now we're gonna move up to the top of the head. Just the top of the head.
So I really have a challenge here.
Michelle Fox: So I really have a challenge here,
Michele Santo: and I forgive the part of me,
Michelle Fox: and I forgive the
Michele Santo: part of me. That was programmed to
Michelle Fox: think. That was programmed to think
Michele Santo: that mommy does it all
Michelle Fox: that
Michele Santo: mommy does it all. Okay, back to the eyebrow point. So now we just had one official round of tapping.
I need to make more time for me.
Michelle Fox: I need to make more time for me. But who will make dinner? But who will make dinner?
Michele Santo: Will my kids even eat
Michelle Fox: if I don't make dinner? Will my kids even eat if I make dinner?
Michele Santo: Tapping on the outside of the eye, they have their driver's license. So they're, they might just go to
Michelle Fox: McDonald's?
No, [00:33:00] they have their driver's license, so they just might go to McDonald's and I don't want them to eat junk food and I don't want them to eat junk food.
Michele Santo: Tapping under the eye. What if I make a change and they don't eat dinner with me?
Michelle Fox: What if I make a change and they don't eat dinner with me?
Michele Santo: That's not really what I want.
That's not really what I want. So I have to figure this
Michelle Fox: out, so I have to figure this out.
Michele Santo: All right. Keeping the hand on the heart, tapping under the nose. And what if I could look at this differently? And what if I could look at this differently? What if I could set a teeny tiny boundary?
Michelle Fox: What if I could set a teeny
Michele Santo: tiny boundary and tell them that I need more time for myself
Michelle Fox: and tell them that I need more time for
Michele Santo: myself?
Keeping the hand on the heart moving to the chin point [00:34:00] and tell them that sometimes they have to make dinner
Michelle Fox: and tell them that sometimes they have to make dinner
Michele Santo: and that gives them responsibility. And
Michelle Fox: that gives them responsibility
Michele Santo: and that gives me more time to myself, and that
Michelle Fox: gives me more time to myself.
Tapping
Michele Santo: on the collarbone point. That's a win-win.
Michelle Fox: That's a
Michele Santo: win-win. I think we can try that. I think we can try that. That would take a load off of me
Michelle Fox: that would take a load off
Michele Santo: of me and get them more involved. And get them more involved. Okay. Tapping under the arm. And say, even though I feel frustrated, even though I feel frustrated, I still love and accept
Michelle Fox: myself.
I still love and accept
Michele Santo: myself tapping on the top of the head. Because parenting is a journey,
Michelle Fox: because parenting is a journey and
Michele Santo: it doesn't
Michelle Fox: [00:35:00] come with a manual. And it doesn't come with a manual. Oh, I wish it did. I wish it did. Tapping
Michele Santo: on the eyebrow point. But guess what? But guess what? I get to write the manual.
I get to write
Michelle Fox: the manual. Ooh, I just got chills.
Michele Santo: All right. Topping on the outside of the eye. And what will I make the manual say, and
Michelle Fox: what will I make the manual say?
Michele Santo: All right. I'm gonna pass the mic to you, Michelle, and just what is one. Small thing you can request from your family to make sure you get some more me time
Michelle Fox: committed days that they cook. 'cause they tell me they'll cook and then we come up to the day and they often forget. Mm-hmm. So I guess the commitment and the follow through. Mm-hmm.
Michele Santo: Okay. Tapping under the eye. And what do you think they need to [00:36:00] set them up for success?
Michelle Fox: probably more reminders when I'm doing the meal planning a week ahead.
Michele Santo: Okay. So you write the meal plan or they, do they make the recipe or you do? They do.
Michelle Fox: Oh, cool.
Michele Santo: Yeah. Okay. Hand on the heart tapping under the nose and say, I can remind them. I can remind them. To make dinner a day in advance
Michelle Fox: to make dinner a day in advance. That way when
Michele Santo: we get to dinner time,
Michelle Fox: well, that way when we get to dinner time,
Michele Santo: there's no confusion.
Michelle Fox: There's no confusion,
Michele Santo: and they know what they have
Michelle Fox: to do and they know what they have
Michele Santo: to do. Hand on the heart, tapping on the chin. What if it's safe for me to take one step back, and what
Michelle Fox: if it's safe for me to take one step back?
Michele Santo: Makes me nervous. It makes me nervous, but I think I can
Michelle Fox: try it, but I think I can try it.
Michele Santo: Tapping on [00:37:00] the collarbone point, and when we find our new rhythm and when we find our new rhythm, I will feel more relaxed. I will feel more relaxed, and they will feel accomplished hopefully,
Michelle Fox: and they will feel accomplished.
Michele Santo: Okay. Tapping under the arm. So maybe this isn't so hard after all.
Michelle Fox: Well, maybe this isn't so hard after all.
Michele Santo: Maybe we can just communicate. Maybe we can just
Michelle Fox: communicate
Michele Santo: and find a solution together and find a solution together. Tapping on the top of your head, I envision us eating as a family. I envision us
Michelle Fox: eating as a family
Michele Santo: and I love when they're involved.
Michelle Fox: What I love when they're involved,
Michele Santo: I. Tapping on the eyebrow point, and I am so excited and I'm so excited to create the time
Michelle Fox: to create the time for me.
Michele Santo: For [00:38:00] me, tapping on the outside of the eye to say it's all working out. It's all working out. Tapping under the eye, we will find a groove.
Michelle Fox: We will find
Michele Santo: a groove hand on the heart, tapping under the nose. And we will have peace
Michelle Fox: around dinner and we will have peace around
Michele Santo: dinner, hand on the heart, tapping on the chin, and I will feel more joyful and restored
Michelle Fox: and I will feel more joyful and restored.
Michele Santo: And that's the mom that they really want,
Michelle Fox: and that's the mom they really want.
Michele Santo: Tap on the collarbone point and say it's all good. It's all good. It will just manifest itself.
Michelle Fox: It will just manifest
Michele Santo: itself, tapping under the arm. And the first thing I need to do, and the first thing I need to do [00:39:00] is talk to them about it, is talk to them about it.
feel more ready. So I feel more ready to have this conversation. To have this
Michelle Fox: conversation.
Michele Santo: Okay. Gently stop tapping and close your eyes. Take a breath in through the nose, out through the mouth. Just revisit that original stress so you are feeling frustrated, discomfort, and a little resentful about balancing the family responsibilities.
So that you can have a little me time. So how stressed do you feel about having this conversation now on a scale of one to 10, 10 being the worst? Hmm. I feel
Michelle Fox: like a three or a four. I'm actually excited to
Michele Santo: them
Michelle Fox: home when they [00:40:00] come home so I can talk to them. Hmm. Wow. Wow.
Hmm. This is powerful, Michelle. Yeah. Hmm. So you
Michele Santo: know what just happened there? Hmm. So the amygdala in the brain, it's like this little almond shape part of the brain that's responsible for fight or flight or response. So when you get triggered and you're like, oh, they're interrupting me again, or, oh, they forgot to make dinner.
You're getting agitated and you either wanna fire away, run away, or people please, that's the fawn. That's like a new discovery. And so when you tap, you're actually deactivating that emotional charge. So even though mentally, you know, you have to have this conversation, you feel less stressed about it.
Michelle Fox: Hmm.
Oh, that's amazing. And
Michele Santo: I'm amazed [00:41:00] at how well it works.
Michelle Fox: Yes. So for my friends who are listening and they don't have the dinner issue, but they have boundary issues in other areas, is, I guess I'm trying to understand the formula. Like is there a basic formula where we'd know what words they could replace this with when they're trying to do the tack on their own?
Michele Santo: I love that you said that because that's the most common question I get. Hey, I tried to tap in between our sessions, but I didn't do it 'cause I wasn't sure what I wanted to say. And an easy technique would be just take your journal out or a piece of paper or even a notes app on your phone and write out all your frustrations.
And there might be 10 of them around one issue. Stick with one issue at a time. Write out your frustrations and then tap through all of them. So you could say, even though I feel frustrated about having this [00:42:00] conversation, I love and accept myself. Hmm. And then once you go through, oh, I'm afraid they're gonna yell back.
I'm afraid they're not gonna eat with me. I'm afraid it's gonna blow up. I hate having to remind them. And then once you start calming down and you get all of that up and out, then you just magically start finding solutions because you wanna have a harmonious dinner tie. This means something to you.
This is important. And so you just naturally get into action mode and you find the silver linings. Oh, if, okay, it's not that bad, I could
Michelle Fox: talk to them. That makes so much sense. 'cause when the amygdala is calm, then I actually have more faculties available. Mm-hmm. To like think lovingly and more supportive and more of a win-win solution that you just helped me walk through.
Exactly.
Once again, [00:43:00] I feel like I'm getting free therapy from you. Thank you, Michelle. You're welcome. I absolutely love this. And for my friends who, like I mentioned may have a different issue, I know You have a lot of great videos on your YouTube channel and that's on various issues, so that could be another healing tool for others.
Is there any place else you'd like me to send my people to so they can get some more of your juicy goodness?
Michele Santo: Well, if this resonates with you, I always offer everybody a mini, like 30 minute session complimentary. So if that's something that you're interested in, You could just contact me on my website or you can email me.
[email protected]. It's Michele with one L. M I c h e l e ss a n t o.com. You can find me on Instagram and message me, and, anyone that's in your community is a friend of mine, so I'd be happy to, you know, just share it with them. And honestly, [00:44:00] I'm, I'm not, I never had a sales script. I'm not a pitch person, so I just love this work so much and I wanna get it in as many hands as possible.
Michelle Fox: Hmm. Well, it's very clear you do this work from your heart and I am entirely grateful, and we will absolutely make sure all of your links are posted in the show notes, or my community can come find you and get loved on. And so I just wanna end by saying thank you, Michele. Thank you. You're welcome.
Michele Santo: Thank you.
Michelle Fox: Consider yourself officially invited to join us in Tamarindo Costa Rica. This coming February, February 28th through March 3rd, to be exact. And I want to ask you something. Are you ready to be completely pampered? Well, prepare to be amazed by our exquisite Villa in the charming town of [00:45:00] Tamarindo. Which will include a massage and a private chef. All of that in the. Most important agenda, which will be for you to relax. Imagine going to sleep with the sounds of the ocean and the trickle of your private plunge pool every evening. Picture a completely supportive environment that helps you return to you. Your imminent relaxation my friend is my command. Let me pamper you. Join us, go to michellefox.com/retreat for all of the juicy details and consider joining us. I would sincerely love having you in this circle. I'll talk to you soon.
Thanks so much for listening to Nourish. Have you been driving, doing laundry or walking around the neighborhood? Sweet. I've got show notes for you. Hop on over to michellefox.com/podcast when you are ready. I will let you know that on the page, you will find resources to support what you just learned on today's show. And then of course you can grab some health supportive freebies as well.
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